I begin my day with prayer.
There have been days when I didn’t have the energy to move myself to the puja room; I told my prayers lying on the bed.
Many days I have sat in my puja room, cried myself dry, as I tried to tell my prayers.
There have been days when I was jubilant with joy when I told my prayers.
These were some intentions which I used while praying – that this is not alright / that person is not right / this has to change / that has to change / please give me this / make me happy!
One day it struck me – the patterns behind the way I was reacting emotionally during praying. I understood that my emotional state was directly related to the intentions of the prayer.
In recent times, I started meditating. There has been a lot of acceptance within me to what I think and what I do. There have been times when I have dealt with all those thoughts which I had hidden in the depths of my memory. It was a difficult process but done with great effort. This has led to a sense of appreciation for myself and the people around me. Everyone, like me, is doing their best and trying hard to be their best!
So, now I have a simple intention for my prayer – just deep gratitude – a simple thank you, for the day, for that particular moment, for the current breath, for good people around me, for the blessings in my life! This intention inspires me to wake up every morning earlier than others. It gives me the inspiration to light the lamp, offer flowers to my Guru, and to the Higher force that I believe in. This intention inspires me to move on with life! It inspires me to be myself, to be able to express the love I have inside me without fear of rejection, to be the best version of myself.
There are days when things are not aligned inside me and there may be feelings other than happiness. On such days, my guiding force is my intention of gratitude for that space on which I stand, feeling my prana in my body!