I was a hoarder for membership cards. I loved to flash those colorful cards around and get points accumulated to my account, not money…mind you 😀
And whenever I bought purse, it was always a huge one. More than looking at space for money, I always checked for the no of cards a purse can hold. And within a matter of seconds I filled up all the card holder space and will carry another separate card holder for all the left over cards. It was a difficult phase to decide which are the important ones to carry in the purse and which can be moved to the card holder.
I’ve this fetish for buying certain things in certain places, ONLY. Provisions are bought in one store of my liking. Even if they provided good vegetables and fruits, I’ll not deviate from the loyalty I had for the small time vegetable vendor in my apartment. Am like that 😉
Jeans are bought in one store, kurtis in another, inner garments in another place…in effect I was always going from one store to another to buy the various things and absolutely enjoyed the whole experience. And in all this going around, I was accumulating points of loyalty!
I was jerked into reality and practicality just a few years back, when I started working alongside my husband. Time was the constraint and I had to do all the shopping I needed in one place and at one time flat. I was crying for shopping time, spent alone, cruising the aisles, looking at new products, new brands and all that fun thing. But, that love was getting split and I started enjoying the time spent building the business and learning the nuances.
The bolt came when I tried to redeem all those cards which I had collected for years. While I imagined an amazing equivalent of money for all those cards, I was dumped down from my card-collecting-high-pedestal and made to understand that all those colorful flash cards were for nothing. The money redeemed was just peanuts. Maybe all these were there when I signed those forms for membership, without even reading the fine print, but I felt disappointed.
I stopped going to different outlets and tried to buy things from one single shop, so that it’ll ease me from getting into those traffic chakravyuhams !
Now a days, I buy from the small time vendor, who brings produce from near his house or a nearby farm. One old lady brings drumsticks from her garden and sells it to me at my office. Another lady makes ghee at home and brings it for selling. Drumstick leaves are gifted by my staff. There is joy in buying from these people. And they bring good products and you can check the authenticity of the products. The happiness they feel when I buy products from them is immense and equals my satisfaction levels.
There are no more flashy cards but only toothy grins as return 🙂
I remember those days, when my girls had just started menstruating – days were – extreme tension filled, sanitary napkin buying spree, screaming because of cramps, whether to go to school or not and also the disgust in seeing those bloody pads. Sigh…seems like decades back! Oh yeah…maybe a decade !
I’ve written many posts on the humor side of this menstrual cycle, jokes made at home by the girls and my own struggle on the same territory.
Today by chance, I came to know that yesterday was Menstrual hygiene day and there is this initiative to educate the girls and the boys on the same for healthier acceptance of this monthly cycle among the younger generation. Its not something to hate or love, but acceptance of the physical creation of the human body. There is nothing to be ashamed or be scared.
There has been many instances at home, when the man, my wonderful husband has felt a little bit shy or even terribly embarrassed at the mention of periods or related menstrual talks or complaints of pain and other such related issues. He has even wondered at his pitiful situation of 2 young just-started menstruating girls and one irritable woman with severe cramps who is troubled more by her PMS. But he survived the initial years mainly through silence and observing what makes us tick or what does not!
He understood more about the process of menstruation from our girls than from me. There has been times when he makes himself invisible, when he hears mood swing screams and banging doors.
But the good thing is he sustained.
Now, he is the one who is constantly looking for home-remedies to treat the menstrual pain and immediately mails the girls. He is the one who gives the “you are stronger than these pains make you feel” to the girls! And he waits patiently with a trolley / basket in hand, when the girls flock to the sanitary napkins aisle in the supermarket! When the daughter calls and says an abrupt “Give the phone to mama”, he patiently obeys her. When I feel irritated or keep snapping, he just knows to treat me with my food cravings. He just knows it!
And there has been moments, when he listens patiently, when I keep going blah blah on how sanitary napkins are not eco-friendly and what are the other methods available that I can try! I admire his patience in listening to these bloody talks! Me being me, I’ve also insisted on him being a ONLY a listener and he has grudgingly agreed to!
I remember a cute couple in a supermarket, where the husband read through the sanitary napkin pack, all the different brands to help her choose the right one for her. Some people might find that too much interference, but I found it as an act, where he involves with her menstruation.
There was this video on how a mother tries to educate her son on the menstrual cycle and that brought up this post.
And it all comes to one final point – communication. Its important to educate the girls and more important to educate the boys on this topic. Its not something to shy away, rather its something to embrace as it is the boon which will keep our human race alive!
Today I saw this cute Mother’s day message on Instagram. One of my amazing blog friend’s daughter has gifted this to her. Its cute and touches a chord inside…esp the last line of the wish.
“You don’t give up on me”
This one…touched deep inside.
Looking from the child’s point of view, it is so very important to them that we, as mothers, don’t give up on them, for their worthiness or for their love of doing things or anything that makes the child.
All children are not the same. Some are very quiet, they rarely discuss what they want to do in life, they are happy to leave the decision making part to their parents and are also happy in taking what life has to offer them.
And then there are others, who want to create their own path. And in that process, try out varied stuff like a sport or a musical instrument or arts. They might not find what they wanted in all that they tried. But they are trying hard to find that particular thing which resonates with their inner being. And that’s the time they value the mother’s “We won’t give up on you…keep trying” attitude!
It’s very important for a child to blossom from her own experience – good and bad inclusive. As a mother I would have warned / counselled my girls about umpteen number of things – this friendship is bad or this hobby doesn’t suit you or it helps to stay cool or how to take care of your health or this and that !
The most important thing which I learnt in the process of motherhood is that all these counselling sessions don’t have any impact if I don’t follow them in real life. I cannot expect my girls to be someone by preaching and not following an iota of what I preach! And that’s why we see a lot of our mother’s qualities in us, in our actions, in our personalities; may be with a slight modification of what we want to be as mothers!
As we keep wishing each other on Mother’s day, let us not forget this important aspect of being a mother, which is to keep our faith strong in our children and to never give up on them; with all the morals which we’ve imbibed in them, I don’t think they’ll become insensible decision makers in their life.