Life’s great lessons, yet told simply…

I’ve a younger sister and brother.  We all grew up with the same kind of dos and don’ts and thankfully, my brother was treated on par with us, girls.  Appa and Amma used to be the same strict parents when they felt we were going beyond their financial boundaries.  But sharing the reality with us, made us aware of the harsh side of life very early in our lives.

We saw our parents slogging day in and day out for a better and comfortable lifestyle; those times were tough ones. Even though they were stressed up for a better financial life, there were small things that they enjoyed and music was one of them.  Whether its MS Subbulakshmi’s Suprabatham or Sulamangalam sisters’ Skanda Shasti Kavasam or the morning Vividh Bharati or the amazing voices of Rafi, Kishore, SPB, Jesudas – every kind of music was appreciated and enjoyed.

One night Vividh Bharati was broadcasting Ghazals by Rafi.  A soulful rendition by Rafi and it was the first time I listened to it.  Appa was sitting and having his usual Vethalai pakku ritual (betel leaves with supari was his favorite) . Listening to it, he suddenly had tears in his eyes.  Music does that to him.  And when I asked why Ghazals today, he told that it was the Death Anniversary of Rafi.  I still cherish this musical memory with Appa.

We three siblings still do – music is a part of our life giving us little places to find solace and peace within us.  Appa played the music he enjoyed and we just took the music forward into our lives with open hearts 🙂

The world may say different things about what we believe is right.  But we need to persist with our beliefs.  For this we need tremendous amount of inner strength to face the world, with our principles intact.  This is another big lesson from my parents.  They were silent yet strong.  They were resilient even when problems hit their shore in subsequent waves.  They learned to smile during tough times and expertly passed on that quality onto us.  And I am so sure that this is the biggest lesson that we three have learnt – its the game of survival with a smile.

And biggest of all was the freedom that they gave us – in doing what we liked in our career, in choosing our friends, to go out with friends – they trusted us implicitly.  And as a mother, I’m trying my level best to impart the same to my daughters and I hope I’ve done well.  This freedom is like a breath of fresh air, when I hear tales of girls not being allowed to do what their heart desired.

Appa resides in our hearts now…
But Amma is still strong in her mind and in the way she’s helping others with financial difficulties.  I see her day in and day out, doing something or other, never resting for a minute.  She reminds us about important things which we need to do asap, in her own gentle way.  She’s a pillar of strength and I’m thankful for her presence in my life.  She still teaches me on how to be busy even when we grow old and enjoy the simple joys of life, as it comes and also in adapting to the changing ways of her grandchildren.

We learn some lessons by reading about it…
We learn some when we are the players in the field…
And then some are learnt by observing our parents…