The month ends, but its a never-ending topic…

Yes, I am talking about CSAAM !!! I hope that all you people have been following the Survivor Stories, the Tweet Chats, the messages by Arpan among the many things the wonderful group of ladies have been doing for the past one month.  Of course, there has been a lot of awareness, with the media coming forward too !!!

I hope that at least from now, the children will surely talk about it and not keep it to themselves. And more than that, I am going to trust that all parents will believe their children and stand up for them, during tough times.

Recently, I had a one of a kind moment, when I met with a 9-yr old girl, a Survivor and totally a fighter.

After her mother’s demise, she came to Chennai with her sister, to study. While staying in the hostel, she was raped by a laborer.  Complaints were made and that guy was later arrested. She went boldly to the Prison to identify that culprit and he is being punished.

I said Bravo, when I heard this. I also understood the trauma she would’ve undergone, during this testing time. But, she amazes me by her smile and confidence. I am happy she overcame the demons inside her.  She wishes to learn the Karate !!!! I said Go for it – she’ll at least be able to kick that guy who comes near her with a wrong intention.

This was the first time ever, that I met with a survivor or heard such a story through a personal contact. The feelings are mixed for me, after I met with her.  I am totally paranoid where my girls are concerned and here I see this brave and courageous girl, all of 9 yrs, trying to face a World, which she has experienced to be dirty. What a difference !!!

I need to protect my girls, but at the same time make them aware of lurking dangers and give them the independence to choose the right and wrong !!! Its tough parenting, really !!! And what with the World, making the job more difficult for mothers like me.

I’ve to talk about one more incident that’s been on my mind for sometime now…

I saw this teenage girl of 12-14 yrs, during my morning walk.  She was little bit on the heavier side and that’s probably the reason, she was walking super fast in the mornings. Since she walked anti-clockwise, I just happened to notice that she was not wearing proper inner garments, which made the older men walking to stand and stare at her young and shaking breasts. Now, this made me furious and I gave them enough glare to make them walk away and to mind their own business.

During my last lap, I happened to meet her mom and spoke to her about this.  I apologised first for talking about their personal matters. But since I am a mother of two girls and these kind of things are hard for mothers to take from others…..I talked to her about how she can make her daughter feel comfortable in whatever dress she wants to wear.  Its we, as mothers and guide, need to tell our children how best we can dress and be comfortable in them too. At the same time, how to maximum avoid the confrontation with the lusting oldies and their ogling eyes !!!

With fashionistas hitting an all high, there are so many varieties of tops to wear with Jeans !!! How can you say NO to ur daughter for the dresses she chooses, for the simple reason that those lusting men will be luring at her ???? It’s a tough thing to balance between the two.  I try to reach a compromise somewhere in-between, where that top can be made to look better with good and fitting inner-wear. I hope that the other mothers will agree with me on this.

While we cannot be with our children, throughout their life, we need to teach them to dress well, protect themselves from getting into unwanted situations and more than that, to scream and shout and call for help. Theres nothing to be embarrassed by the scream, in cases of need.

Even though the Awareness Month has come to an end, this topic cannot rest.  Let the survivors come out and talk and heal their inner souls.  Let this be a beginning to an Awareness drive for those women and children, who need a helping hand.

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About UmaS

A Stay At Home Mom trying desperately to make a difference, in whatever I do !!!
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20 Responses to The month ends, but its a never-ending topic…

  1. shail says:

    Bravo Uma. You walked up to and talked to the mother. I am also glad to read about the survivor, brave little girl.

    Like

  2. Saritha says:

    Hugs to u uma for talking to that girls mother and good that she talked to you.

    I don’t know what i will say to my girls when they start choosing there dresses,till now it is always me who buy but what they wear it is there choice now.Maybe after few years they will buy what they want,but will keep what you said in my mind and will let the girls buy want they want.

    Like

  3. Bikram says:

    Well done to you. You did the right thing talking to tje mother.

    As the topic of this article lets not forget this end of april and not let this guard down ever.

    Thank you for sharing.

    Like

  4. Priya says:

    Cant agree more – the topic is a never ending one indeed. But its good to see a lot more awareness, thanks to the initiative.
    You were brave to talk to the girls mom .. most people become indifferent in such situations fearing harsh reactions.
    And it is heartwarming to read the 9 yr old’s story. So glad that she survived bravely!

    Like

  5. Writerzblock says:

    Super-like this post, Uma. Kudos to you to talking to the girl’s mum. And it is such a shame that men are so disgustingly lustful, that even children need to be protected!!

    Like

  6. Loved this post Ums and so happy that you spoke with the girl’s mother. It’s these small everyday things we do that really counts and can help set things right…

    Like

  7. Sandhya says:

    I am happy to know that you went and spoke to the mother. It is difficult to tell the children not to wear this, not to wear that. They will not know the dangerous world out there. They should be bold enough to open up like the first girl you mentioned.

    Every girl should be taught karate for survival.

    Like

  8. loved the post Uma! very heartfelt and i can;t tell u how i want to slap these old/middle aged men who sit around gaping at young girls!! or any man for that instance…

    Like

  9. Tan says:

    First time in your blog 🙂

    A very inspiring post. Loved reading about the 9-yr old survivor… I guess these days, gals should be aware of all self defense mechanisms.

    Like

  10. Swaram says:

    Brave girl! Kudos to her!
    And to u too Ums for handling it so beautifully 🙂

    Like

  11. Ashwathy says:

    Very well written….very inspiring …

    Like

  12. Pingback: To Sum It Up – 22 « CSA Awareness Month

  13. Scorpria says:

    Way to Uma! Great that you spoke to her mom 🙂

    Like

  14. Rajlakshmi says:

    thats really an enlightening and inspiring post.
    And the way you handled it, should be applauded 🙂

    Like

  15. Pepper says:

    Loved this post.. I fully agree with all that you’ve said and I am really glad you spoke to her mom 🙂

    Like

  16. DI says:

    I am actually sure I wouldn’t have the guts to speak up! 🙂 which is the issue I guess! This is really nice of you Ums 🙂

    Like

  17. UmaS says:

    Thank you all, for everyone of you supported my action of speaking to that mother. I’ve not seen her after that morning and sometimes I feel if I am the reason for that….I guess u all understand that feeling of mine.

    Because there are many out there, who think of ppl like me as the threat for pointing things out and they dont care about the hidden threats in the looks of the outsiders…

    Its a difficult world out there….

    Like

  18. Pingback: Ten on Walking « UmaS Reflections

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