Now, read mine – finally you’ll understand a universal truth. ๐ ๐
When S is on tour
7am – Good Morning call – talks to all of us (the three girls) to wish us a good day ahead.
8am – Girls are off to school
9am – Calls again – What breakfast you ate ??? I ate idly / dosa… ย Did u make sambar ??? Keep some for me, OK ???? The hotel sambar is not at all good… ๐ ๐
10.30am – Calls yet again – What u doing ??? Are u blogging ??? Writing a post ??? Why dont u write abt me for a change ??? ๐ ย ย I ask him, where are you ???? And he answers sheepishly, I am waiting to see Business Client. I cut the line, stating, pl take care of your office work. ๐
1 pm – WOW !! Do u remember this hotel, which we visited during that trip in that year ???? Yeah, the same one…I had an awesome lunch there….so, what are u eating for lunch ????
2.30pm – Hey, you are not sleeping na ???? Just thot will call u once… ๐ ONCE ๐ ย You’ve already called me 4 times today…. ๐
4pm – Have the girls come back from school ??? So, what happened today…give the phone to them…I’ll talk to them. Oh, OK…
7pm – What ??? You made pasta for dinner ???? Why dont u make it when I am there at home ??? Becos you dont like it so much. Thats not the point…this weekend, you better make pasta for me…Oh, Ok….
8pm – Hey, why dont u watch Star World ??? Your fav show is coming – Koffee with Karan !! Really, but that must be repeat episodes…I’ve already watched them all. No, you watch na…its interesting…today its Gowri Khan and Suzanne !!!!
9pm – Are the girls still studying ???? Have you locked the doors ???? Have you switched on the A/c ???? My God, Man, give me a break…. ๐ ๐
10.30pm – Thot I’ll wish you Gnite…I am sleepless in my tour… ๐ ๐
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Now, S is very much in Town.
The whole morning is so quiet – the girls getting ready for school – S deep into the newspaper drinking his chai and I am busy making breakfast.
I suddenly remembered to ask something to S…When I call him, he gives a blank look and says “Everything after the paper….SSShhhh….”
Then S is on the phone all the time, whenever I come to ask him something. “SSShhh….” ย “SSShhh….” ย “SSShhh….” ย for everything I ask….then looking at my forlorn face, he smiles and says “Later….”
S gets ready for office….has his breakfast in a hurry….didnt even bother to ask if I ate my breakfast….and didnt even find out what I wanted to talk with him….HHHmmmmpppffff……
On the way to office, he calls me….apppa, I am all smiles as I pick up the call. “Uma, you just go to the bank and do this and that and this”….GGGrrrrr…..And I’ll call you later, I am getting late for my meeting. I am like…GGGrrrr……
I send a SMS after finishing the bank work and all….no response.
He calls exactly 5 mins after I dozed off in the afternoon….How does he know the time of my afternoon nap ???? ๐ฟ ๐ก ย The moment he realises that he has woken me up, he says sorry and cuts the line.
No evening calls.
He comes home tired and straight away, switches on the TV – There is no life without cricket you see !!! ย I try to talk to him, but all I get is a Hmmmm…..I know he has not listened to a word of what I said. ๐ก
Then he is so tired, that he knocks off to sleep. ย So, no time to listen to what I wanted to say !!!! ๐ก ๐ก
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Before you all come up with different versions to support S, let me share a story I read at Paulo Coelho’s blog, which is very apt for this situation.
A master asked his disciples:
โWhy do we shout in anger? Why do people shout at each other when they are upset?โthe disciples thought for a while, and one of them said
โBecause we lose our calm, we shout for that.โ
โBut, why to shout when the other person is just next to you? โIsnโt it possible to speak to him or her with a soft voice? Why do you shout at a person when youโre angry?โ
The disciples gave him some other answers but none satisfied the master.Finally he explained:
โWhen two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other through that great distance.โThen the master asked:
โWhat happens when two people fall in love? They donโt shout at each other but talk softly, why? Because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is very smallโฆโ
And he finally said:
โWhen they love each other even more, what happens?
โThey do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love.
โFinally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and thatโs all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.โ
So, here is my explanation, to my situation :
When the distance is more, the love grows stronger and fonder. Every minute we are reminded of our spouse and we miss them. The fact that they are not within the meeting distance, makes the frequency of calls more. ๐ ๐
But being in the same city, there is this feeling which the distance has over-ridden and the heart is happy to be nearer. Then words dont matter….one heart understands the other, perfectly. ๐
Uma.. this is such a high mush post!! And it is very true!
It is the exact same scenario with my Mom and Dad ๐ :).. He lives in different city due to his job and calls her (and us) so many times a day. Now I know why ๐
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Btw I am firsttt ๐
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Hey, Piyu…FIRST !!! ๐
See, you needed a frnd like me to explain that scenario… ๐ ๐
Oh dear….did it turn out very mushy… ๐ ๐ Anyway, its good for girls like us… ๐ ๐
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Second ๐
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Mush alarm sounded ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐
Mush ahead mush ahead
Full of mush now, and on a high for a different reason too… that I’m unable to connect my words and thoughts ๐ ๐ ๐
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Ash…SECOND, not bad at all !!! ๐ LOL…so mushy hai kya ??? ๐ ๐ Its OK to be like this once in a while… ๐ ๐
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You women just dont get it !!!
Nah…not like the way you keep getting at things… ๐ ๐
When a husband goes on tour and calls his wife continuously, it is only because he doesnt want his wife to call and disturb him; he is making sure that the missus doesnt call him when he is probably doing something interesting or is with somebody else who is interesting !!!
Oh really !!!!! To make sure of that, he’ll call so many times huh ??? Come on, dont cheat yourself….how many times do you call L, now, after getting married ???? Didnt u call her so many times, the day we all met at Dhaba Express ???? ๐ ๐ This Vimmuuu has a blatant lie to tell, always. ๐
During my courtship days, I used to call her frequently and made sure that my daily quota of calls are done so that I can sit with my recordings peacefully. Otherwise, the call will be from her end when I record my songs which is actually a lill annoying ! ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐
You would’ve loved that call from her…some days you’ve purposefully not called her during the day, and wait for her call in the night… I know all abt it, Vimmuuu…I just know how the mind of men works… ๐ ๐
There are exceptions, I agree. But exceptions shouldnt be considered as examples ๐
That exception is YOU, who loves a call from HER !!! ๐ ๐
If distance makes the heart go fonder, there is also another saying and that is scary – Out of sight is out of mind ! Buhahahahhahahahaha !!!!
You are the DEVIL !!!! ๐
Its all about survival, Uma !! Survival of the unluckiest !!! ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐
You are one lucky soul around and you talking abt the survival of the unluckiest…huh !!!! ๐ ๐
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For once, lemme say I admire ur ability to come up with such non-sense comments on every post ๐ฟ
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I actually second Swaram. Your comments are priceless Vimmuuu! Sheesh.. your mind works faster than a computer. (like chacha choudhary)!!!!! ;-p
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LOL Swaram LOL LOL!!!
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Lol.. I have to admire Vimmuu and thank him for giving the guys side of the story ๐
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I totally agree with whtevr he just said! ๐
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Brat…you are just falling down a big pit, by agreeing to him !!! ๐ ๐
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Vimmuuuu.. interesting!!!
but i face it from family…. what explanation u got for that????
At home,not bothered, but outta sight,and am MOST wanted….
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Good question, Aaroo…. ๐ ๐ Let the Devil answer that one… ๐
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I have nothing else to say except for – let your blind beliefs save you ! ๐
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I don’t know why but I like the Devil’s interpretations ๐ณ He sure is a messiah in disguise
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Simply WOW post!! Can relate to it completely!! Same story this side!!
Liked the Paulo Coelho’s thought… so damn true and right!! ๐
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Hi-5 from me to you !! ๐ ๐ Hugs Shilpa…I know that u’ll be on the same side like me… ๐ ๐
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That is sweet, but too much distance is not good too. Out of sight out of mind happens then. Start sending him emails and messages of the things you want to discuss. Then go ahead and do them with or without him anyway. Then if he protests, look blankly and say, but you did not have the time, and I mailed you na? That’ll teach him to listen to you when he is at home.
BTW I loved the mushy post.
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Oh, I mail him, if its so important…sometimes, he too understands from my tone that its urgent and gives me all the time to listen…Why ??? We’ve weekends to catch up, too… ๐ ๐
Its getting mushier and mushier as I read the comments… ๐
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Awww such a sweet post Ums. Loved what u shared from Paulo Coelho ๐ He is awesome no ๐ ๐
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Oh, thank you darling…. ๐
BTW, you are telling that S is awesome, right ???? ๐ ๐
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Wow! so true and super sweet ๐ ๐
Thank you for sharing this wonderful story, it made things so much clear and totally understandable ๐
A beautiful post, I absolutely loved it!! ๐ ๐
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Thank you, my dear. ๐ So, it did help to clear things, huh ??? I am glad for that. ๐
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Mushy mushy post ๐
completely agree…distance ( for a short while) make heart grow fonder and thanks for sharing the story ๐
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Thank you, Rashmi. ๐ ๐
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Ditto here!
When I was in Kerala and husband was back here. I used to get loving calls, stating how much he is missing the two of us and how sad, quiet and lonely the house is. These days, now that we are back, ghar ki murghi is back to being daal. The house is too ‘noisy’ with the two of us talking, someone can’t focus on his games, has no time to call back. And if he does pick up my calls, it is a brisk,’ What is it, I am really busy’! I think I need to go back on holiday ๐
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LOL Smithu…house is too noisy, huh ???? While I am thinking on sending S on tour, you are thinking of taking a holiday !!!! LOL !!! ๐ ๐ Better idea – both of us will go for a holiday together… ๐ ๐
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Forgot to mention, that I loved the post ๐ Have to show it to husband ๐
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Oh, thank you, Smiths. ๐ ๐ Show it and let me know the reaction. ๐
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i can say awwwwwwwwwwww cant I.. he he heeh
I vouch for this so much.. SO very true.. distance does make the heart go fonder.. one misses the other half so much…
and as they say ghar ki murgi daal barabar.. so when we are close we dont notice..
I shall keep all these point in mind now ๐
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Pl do keep in mind…or rather bookmark this page, for future reference… LOL… ๐ ๐
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Lovely post altogether…the story is wow…
But sometimes people don’t do well in distance relationships..I’ve seen some cases..relationships turned worse :(…
but the logic remains from PC’s story…I loved that explanation !
And oye hoye..husband calling so many times a day is such a wow na ? hahaha…
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Its a WOW, yeah right Nu…makes u feel all romantic and all….I know… ๐ ๐
Glad u like it, Nu…. ๐ ๐
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Such a sweet post!! Yappa..so many calls in a day huh. ๐ Incidentally I read Paulo Coelho’s blog only today too, quite a nice train of thought to have.
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LW, hey, how have u been ???? Long time, no see here. ๐
Thanks…yeah, yeah, so many calls….when the distance is more… ๐ ๐
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How true!! True AND funny ๐
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๐ ๐ ๐ Real life situations turn out funny sometimes… ๐
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HEHEHEHE! ๐ :)This is like what happens in our case too! I totally get your scene there!!!! Alos I am sure this happens sto you too- here till he leaves for office he takes my life about “get this or that”, where did I put this/that! Sometimes I think trips are better!
Also the mad thing he has abt “sit with me till I leave for office” ! But if I do that, finally I myself get yelled at for not completing some work or the other! Men I tell you!
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Indy, I know you will get it… ๐ ๐
Oh dear…dont even remind me of that…that “sit with me” really makes me mad…. ๐
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Distance is directly proportional to love…
More the distance.. more the expression of love..
Less the distance.. less the expression of love
๐
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Perfect understanding…love the definition. ๐ ๐
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The mush quotient does do high when they are not around.. and falls flat once they are back..
As someone said Kahaani ghar ghar ki.. ๐
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Does it happen with you too, Comfy ???? ๐ ๐ Write ur story na… ๐
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AWWWWWWW!!!!!!! ๐ณ
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Why that smiley ??? Are u blushing or what ???? ๐ ๐ ๐
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naa tht was a fake one ..even the awww is fake!
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I tell ya Brat…you will make the best Brat of a husband ๐
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What a lovely post, Uma and so true. When I go to my parent’s place (Hyderabad) I end up spending more time on the phone – talking to my husband!! Absence makes the phone bill go higher, indeed!
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Haha that’s good, ‘Absence makes the phone bills go higher’!!! ๐ Can I quote you Corinne?? ๐
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You’re welcome to Shail. ๐
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So many of the ladies, undergo this kind of scene, like me, huh ??? ๐ ๐ I am loving this. ๐ And loving the last line too…Absence makes the phone bill go higher !!! ๐
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Aww Uma I so wish I could hug you now for this post…
It’s weird for me to wrtie this now, but as me and Y packed our bags and left on diffeent roads we did not shout, in face when together we never screamed too. Silence for us spoke more than words, any damn thousand words.
Distance irks a bit, not replying to messages irritate you, but then at the end of the day being together being surrounded by his smell makes up for all the lost moments which after a point only happen over phone ๐ ๐
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If Y is the one who you don’t shout at then who is this H whose chutney jar you long for? ๐ ๐
Where is taht Brat when you need him??? ๐ก
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whts tht smell she is talking abt…i couldnt understand anything!!! ๐
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Sags, come on hug me na… ๐ ๐
So, now u understood why you both didnt shout nor talk loud, huh ???? See, it takes a genius to decipher things going on like that… ๐ ๐
I understand that second part very well…its so true. ๐ Hugs back to you. ๐
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Sigh! In this case, I guess I’m so unromantic that probably the husband will ask me to read this and learn a thing or two (about calling up :D)
Nice post, Uma. But for once, I agree with Vimmuu’s version. Damn! I HATE it when I’ve to agree with him ๐ฆ ๐ฆ ๐ฆ I always used to make sure “my daily quota of calls are done” ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ Sigh. Poor husband.
During courtship. there were times when i just leave my phone somewhere, and he calls….and calls…and calls…and finally, he had to get my dad’s and mom’s and our landline numbers, so that he can reach me ๐
There are times even now, when i just leave my phone somewhere, and he calls….and calls…and calls…and finally, in the evening storms into the house, asking where the hell my phone is! ๐
One whole day, he didn’t call…(and i of course did not go anywhere near my phone!!)…and in the evening, i ask “Didnt remember me the whole day”? and he said “I did, but well, i couldnt find my phone” Ouch! ๐ ๐
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LOL…you are totally the opposite Priya… ๐ Wish I can be like that… ๐ Will that help in making S answer my calls ??? ๐ ๐
LOL…you and your hubby have such great telepathy – when he calls, you are never near your phone… ๐ ๐
Guys, in love, there is no daily quota of calls…sometimes, all the conversations are not enough, when you are distanced by cities…Sachi… ๐ ๐
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Uma… even before i read Coelho’s piece i knew what i was gonna write… and no, i wasnt gonna support S n comment ๐
The exact same thing happens here… while in town, the whole family ignores me[no, not exaggerating] but when they are away or when am away, i get a dozen calls,enquiring on everything from my health, to floppy, to work, to the places i visited, if i took pics, to wot not…. i wonder why it changes when are in the same place?!! ๐ฆ
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Its all love Aaroo…. !!!! ๐ ๐ When they see you, they get the feeling that all ijj well with you. ๐ So, no need to ask… LOL… I too cribbed, but now I am explaining… ๐ ๐
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Much simple explanation: We take to take for granted what is right in front of us. Once we are far away from it, do we realise how much it matters to us. ๐
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I agree…
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Simply told..thats the crux of the matter. ๐ Glad u understand it all before the MM becomes a reality… ๐ ๐
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Distance does put a special something into a relationship. Sigh, I should know! Have spent most of my life apart from my husband for various reasons. But when together we have so much to talk (oh well, I talk mostly and he listens) that others (read relatives) wonder what we have so much to talk about. During our days of separation we did not have the convenience of cell phones. But now , whenever there is anything (even if it is a lizard) I call him up to tell him. And yeah I don’t wait for him to return home to tell all the news, I call him up at the office and fill him in on things then and there meaning I disturb him a lot. But if I am called frequently, I raise my eyebrows and roll my eyes at the disturbance! ๐ ๐ ๐
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BTW, loved your post! ๐
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Thank you Shail. ๐
I love the way u deal with things…anything for that matter… ๐
In this case, the non-stop calling by you and filling him on the details, made me laugh so much. I visualised what’ll happen if I call S like that… ๐ ๐
Esp love the last line – rolling your eyes and raising the eyebrows !!! ๐
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Now i wonder wht ppl did before the invention of the telephone!
Based on my calculations & comparisons with ur current data,it must have taken atleast 14-16 messenger pigeons to pass on messages throughout the day.
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WOW !! What fantastic calculation, Dr Birdstain Sir !!! Wish I’ve used pigeons to send messages…looks like the Dr approves of it.
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ur spam-ometer ate my comment umaji!! ๐ฆ ๐ฆ
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BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!
where’s my commmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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LOL…Becos u changed ur name…ha ha ha… ๐ ๐
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I like this post :).
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Welcome Harini….glad u landed on a mushy post…he he he… ๐ ๐
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Will all you mushy ladies tell me the secret to send the husband away to some far away place?? That guy never goes anywhere alone!! How will I ever know what love calls are?? ๐ฅ
Btw Uma you sure he was not missing all that idly, samabar and was just checking your BF, Lunch and Diiner??
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Saxy, its Uma not you… so I am sure he was missing her and not just her idli !!!!! ๐
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*shudders* Hitchy u are way to bold to take on those phool bane angaare neuclear weapons ๐ฏ
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Hitch, my friend…thanks. ๐
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Saks, the secret lies in being in the same city and still missing the spouse….then the love calls will happen… ๐
Let me have some talk with Mr Saks… ๐ ๐
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Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww !!!!!
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I take it that u like it. ๐ Thanks. ๐
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Wonderful post !!!
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Thank you. ๐
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so true na.. when our loved ones are near we won’t give a damn and when they are away every moment will be spent in thinking about them ๐
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Absolutely…thats the way the heart thinks… ๐ I am sure you’ll remember this, when u get married too… ๐
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Awwww! That was such an Aww post ๐
It is true you know, I was just thinking after voice chatting with The Dude for th past 5 hours! ๐ฎ
And if he is here, he would be busy playing video games, and I would be reading blogs! :))
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