There is this mother who sits with her teenage daughter of 13 years, everyday, goes through her notes, asks whether she has understood every lesson and answer, asks her questions to revise and spends most of her evening, studying along with her daughter. In effect, she spoon-feeds her !!!!
Not only this mother, there are many, who feel that if they don’t sit with their children, their kids can’t survive the school exams.
When I went to school, I learnt things on my own. Yeah, my mom was there around, but she couldn’t be of great help in my studies, as the syllabus was too much for her to explain. So, when I didn’t understand stuff, I persisted with my teacher, till I learnt it. Any difficulties with subjects, were dealt with in the school and the teachers were a helpful lot, always ready to explain. And I feel that the interest shown by me, mattered a lot.
And those lessons, which I’ve slogged to learn on my own, are still so fresh in my memory. Even now, I can tell the formulas and recite theories, which I’ve learnt so many years back.
So, when my daughters went to school, I made sure that they understand the need, to learn things on their own. Yeah, some kids might be interested only in playing and not in learning alphabets. But leave them – they’ll surely learn, by attending school everyday. When some home work is given, I ask them to do it, before dinner time and leave it at that. May be they’ll miss writing their work on some days. But when asked by the teacher, in front of the class, or by seeing other kids do the work, they’ll learn to doing things on their own. If the seeds to learning on their own, is sown at a younger age, its easy for the kids when they grow.
How long can that mother be sitting with her daughter ???? Even when she goes to college ??? Isn’t it better to allow the child to learn and study on their own ???? Why are the children brought up so dependent, by their mother, for every silly thing in life – Ma, what shld I eat ? Ma, what shld I wear ? Ma, can I play now ? And so on…. A mother can take pride in the fact that the child doesn’t do anything without asking her. But is that what is required ???? Isn’t it our responsibility to bring up independent individuals than simple parasites on us ???? Can’t a teenage child be helped into a good time management procedure, where the child can choose the timings for play and studies ??? Can’t we help our children to think on their own, instead of writing their essays and debate speeches by ourselves ???? The projects are given to a child to test their capabilities of understanding beyond the specific syllabus. What’s the point, if the mother sits to do the whole project ???? Where’s the learning for the child ????
I do agree that all kids are not similar. And some might show good levels of understanding, while the others may take time. So, sit with your child to build on those qualities, which will make them independent thinkers, instead of doing all his school assignments.
When the child is born, it learns to move, crawl, sit and stand on its own – do we demonstrate to the child on the crawling techniques or how to balance when trying to stand ??? The child learns, by making mistakes and falling down several times, but still learns it all fine. Some are late learners, late talkers, late teethers – but the point is, they do it finally.
The school pressure is quite high, now a days and its the responsibility of the mother to build much stronger individuals, who can do things on their own. It certainly doesn’t help to build life-time dependent souls.
So, allow your child to learn, to grow, to think on their own. Too much of spoon-feeding is certainly not good for the child, and neither the mothers.