Some ticketing experience

Now, you all know about our famous Tatkal booking at the Online Railway Reservation page. It always fails me when I need to book Tatkal tickets.

Since I needed one for my husband, I decided to go to the nearest Booking Counter and stand in the Tatkal queue. I reached the Booking Office by 7.15am. There were about 20 people in all. The shutters were closed. The office itself was not open. As I saw the people who were not even in a queue, I wondered who is the first one and where do I stand now ! Little did I know that there was one gentleman who was writing down names in a sheet of paper, so that there is some order, when the shutters open.

Whatever said and done, the Booking Counter officials are so punctual and they opened by 7.30am. Set up everything including their computer. And sharp by 8am, the counters were open to public.

This gentleman who wrote down the names was not part of the Railways. He’s also one among us, who has come to book his Tatkal ticket. Every day, a different person takes up this role.

Around 8.30am, he started calling out the names from the list and whoever has written the name and not present at the moment has lost their chance to stand in the queue. The others formed a queue and went and sat in the chairs.

Sharp 9am, I see a lady aka Headmistress walk over with a bunch of forms. Its then I realize that they have printed new forms separately for Tatkal booking. I was reminded of a typical examination hall, where we are being given question papers to solve. She kept reminding everyone that they should have the xeroxed ID proof of the person who is travelling along with his signature and also the original during the time of booking the ticket. Some instructions – one after the other, kept reminding me of the strict disciplinarian she was.

We were given time till 9.30 to fill our forms. She then came and checked our forms along with the ID xerox and put her initials on every form. Also there was a separate counter if you are buying for someone else (Representative) and three counters if you buying for yourself (Self). At sharp 10am when the counters opened for booking, she sat there along with a policeman and regulated the booking of tickets guiding every person as to which counter is becoming free. Even though some people might think like she is treating all of us like children, I found her strict way of dealing with everyone a better approach than to keep shouting at an unruly mob, who want tickets urgently.

In our country, we don’t follow rules on our own. We do only if we are forced to and only if someone is watching us closely. We don’t wait in queue patiently. We don’t give way for others, especially senior people. In these of kind of situations, such a dynamic lady’s active guidance was greatly welcome.

Am so proud to have got my tatkal ticket. With some order in place, queues do move faster

Faith came back to me…

in recent times, but in a different way !

Wiki defines Faith as

Faith is confidence or trust in a person (as in their ability), thing, deity, in the doctrines or teachings of a religion, or view (e.g. having strong political faith) even without empirical evidence. It can also be belief that is not based on proof, or as confidence based upon varying degrees of evidential warrant. The word faith is often used as a conceptual synonym for hope, trust, or belief.

I remember those childhood days, where at every opportune moment, faith in our religion, our Gods, our customs, our myths was being thrust upon me.  I rebelled sometimes. “Why should we do namaskaram?” “Does God sit and watch me do it?” “What is the use of chanting all these sanskrit slokas, without understanding the meaning?” “If I don’t apply Vibuthi and Kumkum, why should God hate me?” The questions were endless. Some were asked aloud and some were swallowed with a gulp, for the questions were met with a final glare like “Just do what we say”.

I went around the temples just for the sake of it, wondering to myself if God is watching me do this and if He’ll be happy to see me doing the rounds around the temple.  I asked those Gods, the Ganesha, Shiva, Vishnu – if they are able to hear me chanting the slokas.  Since the meaning was out of my reach, at that age, I wondered what will happen if I am wrong in my pronunciation.  Then one fine day, my aunt introduced me to the Skanda Shasti Kavasam, a long long sloka for the Lord Muruga. First, I was attracted to the music which goes along with singing the slokam. The most important thing was the sloka was in tamil, a language I could understand and so when I recited the sloka, I felt like talking to God. And immediately, Muruga became the favorite God. And of course, my paati gave me permission to recite this sloka even during the menstrual cycle. All other slokas were banned to be recited during those times. There was also this thought that if God gave us the cycles and he wants us to recite the slokas, then why not during those times ?? Some questions were never answered.

This Muruga phase kept on for a considerable time as I became more comfortable with the tamil lyrics and that wonderful tune.  I thought it was faith that I had in Muruga, that good things were happening to me. I did my college well, got a good job, married a good man…all those good things that happened to me, was the result of my never ending in faith in Muruga, or so I thought.

During the times of handling two little girls and the motherhood demands, I did take a break from reciting the slokas.  That faith for my daughters’ good health and happiness was the only thing that I cared about.  God was present with me in the form of my girls and that was the only faith that helped me to move on.  The good things didn’t cease to happen, even with the break given to recitation of slokas. The realization, which is often quite late, hit me – there are certain things that are meant to happen to me and that they happen at any cost.

Of course, the good things were also followed by a little bad phase. This didn’t mean that the non-recitation of the slokas were taking a toll on me. By this time, I was much matured and started understanding how things happen to us and its all in my mind and attitude to make things happen.

The more positive thoughts that I develop, the more positive are the things that happen to me. Faith meant a new thing now, which is positive thinking.

From a strict orthodox family with meticulous following of the rituals and customs, we have come a long way, where we take pride in doing my paati’s funeral ceremony the Arya Samaj way.  Its not the rituals that count, but how sincere we have been in doing it.  Amma has been donating to charities every month during paati’s thithi date. Its the faith in the new way of thinking that by feeding the hungry, helping the poor, we find God in that act.

There had been ups and downs in life.  But every phase was met with a smile saying “This too shall pass…”  There is a new Guru now, who guides me from time to time – my Sai. There are many Secrets and Alchemists to show me the simplest way forward.  All in all, there is only one message – Think Good, Help others, Be happy, Do not change yourself for others !  That faith has evolved inside me from time to time and now I feel more closer to the Super power, which sets this world go round.

“Things we lose have a way of coming back to us in the end, if not always in the way we expect.” - from Harry Potter and The Order of The Phoenix, J.K.Rowling

So alike, yet so different

Comfy’s posts always makes me gooey inside, whenever I read about her cute little girls. I feel bad for all the lost out posts of mine, where I could have written and stored about my kutti girls doing this, doing that and my early motherhood hangovers and stuff like that.

Time is not lost totally and I want to go ahead and write about my girls who are totally alike yet different in many ways.  Let me put the thinking board to work !! They both are alike in many ways – actually they are like me in many ways. I loved the gene transfer that happened here

Starting from being engrossed in a book till we reach the last page, watching TV shows like Castle, Two and a half men, Big Bang Theory, rom coms, those heart wrenching romantic movies, eating at our favorite Paradise in Hyderabad – we three are the same total romantics to the core !! Me and my younger one still shed a tear or two while we watch K3G !! And we all love watching JWM, for that “Kuthe, kamine” scene…

Oh ho…I have ventured diagonally to my similarities with them

The elder one is calm and composed, gives her opinion only when asked for it, plans ahead for all things that happen, is organized and absolutely creative. She has a great penchant for drawing, doing posters, making crafty things learning from the net, surprising everyone around her with a beautifully made card by her and her dedication and patience is something to applaud.  If people talk bad about her, she just ignores them and goes on with her life. She chooses her friends with whom she can have a great friendship through her life.

On the other hand, the younger one is like a storm on a quiet night, tells aloud “loud and clear” that this is how she is, never stops at voicing her opinion and also cares a damn if people don’t like her opinion. She hates to draw – all her science drawings were done by me and the elder one. That was one main reason she opted out of Science group Plans don’t work for her…even when she makes one, she just cannot follow it !! Impulsive, high on temper – actually emotions, very demanding of everyone – including love !!  If people talked bad about her, she will hold their collar and ask them to explain why. Then she’ll ignore them. She thinks that all thats white is good and pure and is slowly realizing the meaning of true friends who stay put with her and the others who smile with her and talk behind her back.

And of course there are some things which they do equally with great synchronization. Like the days, when they give a tight hug, telling me to stay calm and that they are there !! They bug me with their continuous ranting of “Ma” “Ma”, simply for the fun of it. Their overflowing love towards us is something unparalleled on this Earth.

Both of them have this wonderful art of giving to others and helping the needy. I feel blessed to see them help others.

When me or hubby get back home tired and they greet with a hug, a smile, a glass of juice / cup of tea – that moment, I am glad that I gave birth to them.

Bindu’s post on Parentous made me actually ask my girls to describe me in one word. The elder one, being such a sweetheart, described me as her “Universe”, which made me glow in the enlighted motherhood !! The younger one, first dodged me, saying its difficult to describe me in one word. But, all that she can think of at that moment is, “Ma, you are like the air I breathe…” !! And I was breathless with joy !!  Later, when I was getting ready to go for a wedding reception, she came and asked me, “Do you want to know one more word to describe you?” I nodded. She said “Pretty”. Who will not go Awwww at this moment !! I am no exception.

With so much of love here, I feel this is one apt post for Valentine’s day…what do you say ??

Conversations with your little girl…

I recently came across the news which is generally shocking to the nature of this Chennai city, which is that girls in Grades 6 and above have boyfriends. And that too, sometimes, more than 1.  This is a tremendous shock for the traditionally culture driven South Indian Society who live here.  These are unacceptable scenarios, for various reasons :

• The parents were brought up in such conservative situations and ideas, that they think of this as blasphemy.
• Since the concept of arranged marriages is a long-standing tradition here, this concept of having boyfriends at a young age is quite unacceptable to them.
• There is also this stubborn streak inside families which still force to implement the “girls cannot talk to boys” rule, especially after the girl attains her puberty.
• Also, there are many families who insist to the colleges to separate the girls from the boys, quoting the “focus on studies” is more important – that’s another post by itself.

Ok…is it so bad to have a boy friend ? And why all friends who are boys, treated like the “boyfriends” by parents ? Is it wrong for a girl to have a good friend in the opposite gender ?

I don’t think it’s so terribly wrong to have a friend in a boy. If he is going to be a good support for the girl in all the friendship ways, then its all the more good for her.

Those fancy ideas that having a boyfriend is so filmy and that compulsion to have one that are to be given serious thought about.  ”In a relationship” is so commonly seen in FB now a days.  If a girl doesn’t have a boyfriend then it should be ok. But the peer pressure to have one is so high now a days that it actually kills the girl.  Girls are sidelined by their friends during conversations and during play times, if they do not have a boy friend. The girls who have boy friends talk about it most of the time that the girls without boyfriends cannot join in this conversation. This makes this girl to think of herself in such low-esteem that confidence evades her. She starts going into a shell. During times like these, comes in the role of a parent, especially the mother, whose conversations with her little girl can do wonders.

It’s very important to have great conversation times with your child from the beginning and the underlined code is “never snub your children, when they voice their opinion on something”.  Allow them to talk freely about what they feel like. It’s very important to keep the conversation flowing. Do not make the child think that you are a strict warden with a whip in hand to slash her on every word mistake she makes. It’s ok to make mistakes, they learn from that. Being firm with moral values and being strict with them are entirely different. It’s very important for mothers to understand this basic difference. So, be firm not strict.

And share some secrets with your little girl. Take her into your confidence. Share a knowing smile that you two know something that even daddy is not aware of.  That gives a goad in the right direction to your daughter, to make her talk about her secrets.  You, as a mother, should be the first person she turns into to clear her doubts and share her anxieties. I remember how my daughter used to come to me every morning, with a question on menstruation among other things. It made me feel happy that I am the Google for her. She looked out for answers and explanations from me. And I had to be honest too. Sometimes, her doubts were far beyond her age. But I tried my level best to explain things that she could understand and later when she grew up, I explained all those missed out things.

One more thing to make conversations, is to greet your child, who comes home from school, with a “How was your day?? Did your friend come to school ? Did you play with your friend?” Concentrate more on the friendly relationships she has made in school than with a moronic boring “What homework do you have??”  Education is very important, I am not deviating.  But when relationships around your daughter are more solid, then she’ll be very confident of herself, of her friends. Studying becomes a natural thing to do, apart from playing.

Be very frank with your child. Even if you have made a mistake, accept it. Show that its human to make mistakes. But once we have apologized, we need to stick to it and not repeat it.  We cannot have different set of rules for us and for the children.  Also, when the child makes a mistake and admits to the mistake, let it go. Do not ponder on it by talking about it again and again. This is another way of shutting up your child.

A hug, a kiss, a praise, a smile can go a long way in building a great rapport with your child. Be the one who your child will seek first and see your conversations grow !!

**My understanding is based on the rapport that I’ve with my daughters. It might be different for you. If you have a better idea, method for great conversations, please share with me.

#10HappyThings

There’s this new tag doing the rounds now, which is #100HappyDays, where people post a picture a day depicting their most happy moment for 100 days !

I wanted to do that tag…so badly, but couldn’t, due to various reasons. So, I made this post about the 10 happy things that are always doing the rounds around my home

It may appear as small things or really petty ones, but it did bring a smile on our face, made us more happy than before – such small treasures of happiness are what that makes this world go round and round. The contentment and joy of those small things which makes us tremendously happy is something to experience and live through.

#HappyThing1

A long drive always rejuvenates the soul, esp for me

#HappyThing2

The girls splashed paint and color for one whole day and finally came up with this poster. Loved it !

#HappyThing3

Colored headphones made the daughter smile and me too

#HapppyThing4

This quilt was hand-stitched by my elder one for her elder cousin-sister as her wedding gift. The thought of such a gift to her sister is so touching and made me smile more

#HappyThing5

The Drummer at home, my younger one, always makes us happy with a beat or two We are proud of her

#HappyThing6

Happiness is balloon shooting at the beach. What do you say ??

#HappyThing7

To quote Nigella – “I am the happiest, when I am in the kitchen”
Happiness is cooking for the family

#HappyThing8

Happiness is cake baking in the oven…that intoxicating baking smell, the anticipation that the cake should come out well is still the same even after many years of baking  :)

#HappyThing9

Cloud watching should feature in the list of happy things. We three girls, always love to sit in our balcony, gaze at the sky, laugh / amaze at cloud patterns. This collage is a collection of recently clicked sky-watch pictures.

#HappyThing10

Finally, there is happy news which I want to share with all you readers of my blog – My blog has been shortlisted for BlogAdda Blog Awards in the Personal Category. Its thanks to all your readership, that the Jury has shortlisted my blog. Being made to the shortlisted category is itself a big win for me and I am tremendously happy to be there.

To make my blog win, please do click on the following link and like my blog there.

[LINK TO MAKE MY BLOG WIN]

Its been a long journey in this blog world and I feel so happy to have made so many friends through this blog of mine !

She…

She came home with a big suitcase, all happy and thrilled about the thought of being home for a long time.

The things which she left behind didn’t matter anymore.

Like a whiff of fresh air, she made everyone happy.

But now, she left, the love of her family.

The holidays were over in a jiffy !

Written for BlogAdda’s WOW – Love Sho(r)ts !

(Picture courtesy : Google)

The best part of being in Chennai

Moments are rare when I feel totally happy and absolutely thrilled to be living in this seaside city called Chennai. Many people have asked me “Isn’t this your home town ? How can you not like it?”. Yes, I do like it – all my near and dear ones are here. Except for that fact, this city has never captured my heart, as Hyderabad did, during my stay of 7 years there.

But there is this magic in this city, which I relish, savor and enjoy whenever I get the chance. And that is the amazing coast line this city is blessed with. How can I resist the sea breeze which flows through my hair, in a way inviting me to come and spend some time in those waves and sands ??

Those moments spent on the sands, is one of the most invigorating moments in my life, especially due to the reason, that I walk barefoot on the sands. It’s an amazing feeling, such therapy to my feet and I love the way the sand flows through my toes while I walk.  And its an absolute blessing that my girls think the same way like me and totally enjoy their visits to the beach, walking barefoot, wetting the feet in the water – it’s a delight that such simple joys exist in this world and for which I can die for.

I remember growing up with the waves, as a small girl. We used to stay near the beach and the walk from home to beach will easily take 30 mins and that was the exciting half hour of the day. As me, my siblings and my cousins walk and run to reach the beach, the excitement builds inside us, anticipating the moment of getting wet. We never hesitated to get totally wet. That was the final objective of that trek of 30 mins. The big waves excited us, especially when the salt water went into our mouths or when it used to sting our eyes.

After having the ball of our life playing with the waves, we start with the munching things. Roasted corn, Thenga Manga Pattani Sundal, Kai Murukku – actually anything that catches our fancy will go into our tummies too. And by this time, we were totally dry in that amazing wind.

Then we start building sand castles and playing our heart out, till we were literally dragged out of the sands by our parents. Those visits happenned almost every weekend and it recharged us for the upcoming week.  I cherish those beach visits and the absolute joy it gave me.

Now also, the beach has the charm to mesmerize me and hold me in place just by a small visit to that magical place. There is no playing around nor the urge to make sand castles. But to just be there, watch the people throng the waters, the other kids playing around, the amazing rise and fall of the waves – there is such contentment in being there; living that moment totally and consciously. And those big waves that wet me totally are not my favorite anymore.  I feel that smaller waves that come and touch my feet lightly gives me the maximum pleasure. Is it the age or have I matured in my affection towards this amazing place called beach ??? I don’t know nor I want to know

Visits to the beach, makes me come alive for my love towards Chennai. And like a small child, I don’t feel like going home from the soft sands and waves. It’s a blessing to be around such a place, right ??

New Year and Resolutions !

“I am starting on a diet, to reduce my weight”
“I am going to hit the gym, from this Jan 1st”
“I am going to stop smoking / drinking / etc…”

As New Year approaches, these are some of the statements, I hear, being pronounced by people, spare the mike.  It’s all very good resolutions. Changing for the better is always welcome.  And of course, when done as a group, motivation is quite high and things might work out very well.

But I slightly beg to differ in regard to these resolutions.  For me, the will to change something has to happen from inside and not because of a particular date or the advent of a New Year.  I feel that the day I want to change for the better, I should start implementing it in my lifestyle.

I’ve been wanting to do yoga for sometime now.  Of course, I attended a course and was a regular at the classes for 4 months. So, sort of know the regime and the asanas to do on the 5 days of the week. I am unable to attend class now and I seriously want to do at least pranayamams everyday. There is no internal discipline in me to do this and I am embarrassed about not doing it for the past year.  If I don’t have the will to get up early and spend some time for yoga, how will a New Year or a resolution help me?  I am seriously critical of myself for not doing it and I push myself into doing it everyday. The push has to be there everyday not just on a New Year. What do you say ?

I even took a resolution of not drinking fizzy drinks. First they are too much on the sugar and then the thought “Why can’t I help the local tender coconut water guy to benefit ?” – all these helped me to decide on that resolution.  But what happened ?? I was pushed into a situation, where we were on a long drive and I was absolutely thirsty and no tender coconut water around. To avoid being dehydrated, I had to buy some sugary fizz drink and solve the situation.  I lacked will power that day – my pledging resolution didn’t help me.

But, once I decided to stop drinking tea, I could do it easily, thank God for that strong will power in this regard.  Its been 4 months now and I am not even tempted when I prepare tea for others.

The kind of resolutions associated with dates or New Year never tend to hold on long.  I’ve seen people tell me “From tomorrow I’ll stop eating oily food” – That tomorrow never came !!  It’s always the same statement and same lack of will power to do it immediately.

So, for all the resolutions to work, the key character that should be inside every person is WILL POWER. If such a thing is there in you or if you can cultivate it and make it strong, then any change is a breeze. There is no need to wait for any New Year to make a resolution. Just at the click of the hand, things can change for us – for the better.

Today, sitting here, I pray to God to grant me that will power, with which I can change myself for the better and also make my resolutions to happen !

Sulekha Rawat’s blog – A review

When our Indiblogeshwari group decided to do this activity of Secret blog elf, I was just too happy to take part in it. In the past few days, the smiles that I could sense on my friend’s faces, because of a simple postcard I sent, gave me the inspiration to sign up for this activity. I know for sure that I’ll be bringing on more smiles

Dear Sulekha,

The moment I open up your blog page – Sulekha’s page, the first thing that hits me is your awesome smile in every picture you have posted, especially the one with your dad. Such smiles is a great welcome sign to your blog.

I just want to give you a great hug Sulekha, if that’ll help you to get over your Dad’s loss. I’ve been there in a similar situation and I can so relate to the many posts you wrote about him. I lost my dad 3 years ago and I can absolutely understand that special father-daughter bond. Your poems and posts about your dad touches a chord inside me too. Those regrets of not visiting him when he was hospitalized – I can totally relate to that. I still have my own regrets of not spending enough time with my dad !!

Your first post in June 2010 about that accident in the rick – Oh dear…thank God for those good people around you. BTW, I’ve never felt comfortable in that rick. I don’t know how you managed to go in it.

I loved all your poems – you play with words in the most wonderful way, bringing out emotions that have lay hidden inside for long.  I do find that there is a long list of poems mostly on love – its really amazing. I just cannot pen so many poems, as easily as  you do.

What an interesting collection of poems you have written – many reflecting on the pain inflicted to a woman’s heart and its consequences, a love failure and its deep retributions, love and affection and how the soul lives on with the knowledge of the other loving soul. I think you should seriously think of publishing your poems.

And totally appreciate your effort in the social potpourri.  Hard work always has its fruits. And I am glad you found a great friend in Kriti to do the same.

Not to forget the fantastically woven stories – again looks like love is your strong point for writing.  And I totally totally loved this quote by you - 

Love is the last ingredient that completes a person, if one has love in his/her heart then there is no richer person than that one.

Loved your post about your Adam’s 7 different ways of telling love  - its a totally feel good post.

I loved the take on 55er under the title “A woman scorned” – Oh my…that was one evil woman who got her revenge.

Absolutely enjoyed your funnily written post on the elevator phobia…I remember me going in the elevator with my aunt as she is like that too.

Hi-5 to that crazy cook cum baker inside you…feels great to know there is another one like me

Finally, it feels good to know so much about you, through your blog. You continue your play with words and become a published author soon. My best wishes dear Sulekha

Love
UmaS

A Bullet list on my thoughts…

Did I read about a bullet list post somewhere ??? Oh yeah, my dear Pix wrote a random list of things which just opens up her mind and thoughts to us.

Since I was too cut short for time, this kind of bullet point post will help me to at least write the various thoughts that run through my mind right now !!

• Recently I saw this happen in FB.  It was someone’s birthday and people were writing on this person’s wall, wishing him well. Among them I found a person, who wished him with a comment about his physical appearance, especially mentioning about how heavy he was.  How insensitive can people be ?? Do they even know what others go through !! No person is happy to be over-weight. They too are trying their level best and probably its their genealogy and they can’t do anything about it.  It’s so easy to comment on the physical appearance of a person. Just stand in their shoes to know what the other person feels…am totally upset !!
• Daughter is coming home for semester holidays…am absolutely happy
• There are people who take their health so casually. They don’t realize how much they are hurting their loved ones…am really sad !!
• Absolutely enjoyed myself in the kitchen – more kuzhambu and vazhai poo paruppu usili for lunch, coconut and lemon sevai for evening tiffin. Food does make me happy…feeling heaven through the taste buds
• Doing a tamil crossword with MIL and raking the brains. And suddenly she tells me check with Google if you can’t find an answer…ha ha ha…am feeling good about life
• Suddenly thought of sending postcards to my friends. Writing to each one of them is such a beautiful experience and am totally enjoying this task I gave myself !!
• Chennai is quite cool now. Even the sun seems milder. People are walking around in jackets, scarves, sweater too. For once, Chennai weather is making me feel happy !!
• My cousin is visiting and his 2 yr old kid’s non-stop blah blah is making me laugh and smile without any reason…feeling immensely blessed to hold a baby and hear the nonsensical talk !!
• BTW, I need to put up that Christmas Tree when the younger one is free…feels good about catching the festive spirit.
• Finally, feeling happy to have written down a lot of things in one post…thanks Pix

So, what are your thoughts ???